Birthday #6

David had his 6th birthday. Still refuse to really accept that.  I love this little man.  He melts my heart, he is sweet, he is tender, he notices things, he listens, he secretly sings along with me when I obsessively listen to Alicia Keys in the car, he loves anything that has to do with video entertainment, he is my little boy.  It's a beautiful challenge to have the chance to be his mother.  I feel so blessed to have him be the only boy in a house of girls.  David is a tender young man, and sometimes I forget how sensitive he really is when he gets sad when I comment of how dirty he is when I pick him up from school.  I was washing the bedding, after a long battle with the throw ups, and found a book under David's pillow - My Mom is Great. 
David doesn't ask for much, except always wanting to play video games, so when he asked for a birthday party I was a bit stumped.  Then I asked which kids he wanted to invite and he thought and thought and came up with his best buddy from school, Kennedy.  Not surprising, Kennedy is a girl.  We ended up doing a video game party, because David loves to play video games and he's occupied with anything that has to do with Mario.  It was a nice low key event with friends. 
I love my David. Happy birthday to you - the sweetest boy.

 

 

Thank you to everyone who made the week long celebration of David's birthday so special. David felt the love and I know he appreciated every single thing...like the beautiful Mario cake, Smash Bros, flip flops, art stuff, shoes but mostly feeling the love from everyone and sharing this celebration. Thank you to all for loving my David and helping him feel loved.

Dirty Girl SD 2013

A rite of passage.  Mud. Running. Friends. Sweat.  Walls. Dirty Girl.  Race details... not too strenuous, muddy and beautiful. 
I took this opportunity to have a girls weekend with friends.  The race was on a Saturday morning in San Diego, so it's only logical to spend the night there.  A perfect equation for a weekend getaway.  I have only been away, alone, from my family (Jeff and kids) once in my life and it was just for a total of 12 hrs.  This has been a long time coming, for many reasons.  Mainly, I feel like I need to take some time and step away in order to not feel overwhelmed and exhausted.  I'm not saying every mother is like this, but I am like this.  I love being able to be a stay-at-home-mom and feel so blessed to have that special privilege of being able to witness every stage of growth of all of my children.  Not every mother can be at home with their kid(s) nor wants to, but I get to.  I am grateful for a hard working husband who sees the importance of having a parent available for their children at all times.  It's not easy.  It's work.  It sometimes feels like a thankless job.  I don't get days off.  I am always tired.  It is lonely, really lonely some days.  It makes you feel inadequate, never good enough.  It is hard.  BUT, I also feel that I'm the luckiest to be able to know (even if I can't really remember exact dates) when my kids took their first step or said mama or said "I love you" or to know that because I am home with them I know that oatmeal with extra "love" means lots of brown sugar.  Lately, I have been realizing that my kids are not slowing down, in fact, they seem to be growing faster and faster every day.  I don't know how that is happening because I don't feel like I'm getting older, but in fact I am and in fact THEY are growing up.  I have come to realize that I need to work hard to be present in the lives of my family.  I can't just watch them, I have to be in there - getting dirty!  The time when they are little and you are their world and the coolest and the strongest and the only one that can solve problems is very short in comparison to when they have to do things for themselves.  And just as quickly as they are doing things for themselves they start to realize that you aren't as cool as you once were.  I want to bottle up the look of hope that my little ones have, when they can't figure something out and come to me and they truly believe I am a master and will figure it out for them.  I love that!   My oldest always has to figure things out for herself before she comes to me.  It takes a lot for her to ask me, but when she does, it tugs at my heart because I know she has a twinkling of hope that I can solve her problem. 

The point to my rant?  No point.  I love my family.  Jeff is truly my safe place.  He works so hard for our family and makes an effort to maintain my happiness.  He knows me at my highs and at my terrible lows and loves me and holds me up when I can't stand.  My kids have turned my heart inside out, only in the best way.  They have helped me love in such a way that I never quite imagined.  I love these kids without end, so much that it I can't breathe sometimes.  I will do anything to protect my children and to keep them innocent as long as possible because children need to be innocent. 

My family dropped me off, and I took my bags and walked away from the van, full of my life.  I cried. Not really visible to those around me, but I did cry.  I didn't cry because I didn't feel they were safe but I cried because my whole life was in that van.  I can't explain it.  I needed this weekend.

It's hard for me to make friends.  I'm kind of awkward and I have tried so hard to not be such a recluse but it just seems to be my lot.  Anyway, I am so grateful for the friendships that I have in my life right now.  I have one older brother and didn't get to experience having sisters as I grew up.  I feel like my very precious friends, are my sisters in the way that counts.  I don't have to have long, heart filled conversations with them.  Sometimes we can connect by a glance across the room and that's all it takes.  I love having girlfriends that I can talk to without censors because I know I won't be judged.  I have come to realize that my happiness, in part, has a lot to do with the presence of my girlfriends.  I went through quite some time without friends and the loneliness was so suffocating.  I couldn't quite pin why I was so unhappy but now I can see that I needed to have friends who weren't there because of obligation but were there(in my life) because they choose to be friends with me.  I don't know if that makes sense.  One thing about me...If I am your friend, I will never stop being your friend.  I think friendships are precious treasures.  The sweet friends I have in my life are just that - treasure. 

Anyway, I feel like I need to just scream a big Thank you.  This weekend helped me regroup and remember my blessings.  I am so grateful for my family, my friends and my life, as hard and hectic as it is...I am grateful!

 

 Pre-race smiles and clean, matching socks!

 

Walking to the start.

 

 

Competitive much?

 

 One last mud pit before the pink finish line.

Post-race smiles and muddy socks.  We don't look dirty, but we became dirty girls!  Washing out our clothes later that day, after we rinsed them at the race proved lots of mud was absorbed.  Until the next Dirty Girl event...team names are now in the works.

 

Looked over my shoulder...

Why do these strange people keep calling me "mom" and expect me to give them snacks?  The little one in the yellow top is especially demanding!
I love these people so much!

Finally, Christmas

**Warning** Super long post to follow with lots and lots of pictures.

So, we kind of had a rough welcome into the Christmas break.  Almost a month of stomach bug woes, which entailed a lot of vomit, diarrhea, laundry in the middle of the night, laundry all the time, and scrubbing vomit off of carpet.  So, needless to say, we were ready for Christmas break to come around so we could get away from everything!  Thankfully, the kids were all in the clear before we made the journey, and journey it was, to Idaho Falls.  We make the trip every other year for Christmas.  I don't think I would mind if it wasn't a 2 whole days in the car driving sort of thing.  But with kids, we can't really force it or we would all be screaming and in tears.  We had DVD players, DS system, lots of blankets and snacks.  Jeff's sister, Mindy, lives in St. George and we crashed at their place.  It's sort of half way to our destination so it's a nice place to stop.  Plus, it's always so fun to stay there. And, this stop made for us meeting the newest Bird twinners!  I fell kind of in love with Oliver and Griffin, or maybe it was just the right amount of baby I needed to fill my baby void.  I loved holding them and right before we left I had a chance to hold both of them at the same time and I was a little overwhelmed and totally in awe of Mindy's charge.  We also had not seen our other nephews, Lincoln and Parker, in a while.  4 kids 3 and younger!  I actually got Lincoln to talk to me a few times, and that was kind of awesome for me because I feel like he doesn't see us often enough to really know us so it was fun that he didn't mind us invading his house.  Mindy and Jesse are such good hosts and so welcoming, we love you guys!
Once we finally made it to Idaho, freezing but no snow, we didn't really drive much - thankfully so!  The kids didn't understand why there wasn't any snow, but nature was rumbling and snow was had most of the time we were there it was either snowing or just snowed.  The kids loved that!  A snowman was built, just one and it by the time it came to build the head it was a bit small!  It was my way of working out while on vacation, building a snowman.  A couple of days after the snowman was built, I saw several children (including 3 of mine) delightfully kicking the poor snowman until it fell apart.  It was a bit disturbing but they were having so much fun that I had to laugh.  We went sledding and riding on fun and fast snow mobiles, Jeff and Veronica tried cross country skiing and I froze my buns the entire time.  I forgot my one and only "winter" coat and I don't have proper footwear for snow. 
It's nice to be with Jeff's family during this time of year.  Jeff's mom, Mary, made us incredible dinners every single night and always made sure she had fun things for the kids.  I think it's awesome how she had the kids make chocolate houses, and let them decorate them however they pleased (that is only an activity that a grandma can do...because as a parent I would be too annoying) and there was one night that she had them do carmel apples.  I think this is what Christmas is all about.  Not so much candy indulgence but spending time together as family and creating memories that are sweet and tender.  We did the traditional Enos family bowling, minus Mary because she volunteered to stay home with the babies (Violet and Logan). 

Christmas morning. Love this!

 Violet, Vanessa, Rosie and David.

 Violet helping grandma make baked oatmeal.  So good!

 Remnants of the snowman.

 David asked for a picture so long as it didn't show the pink snow pants.

 Just thought this was cool looking.

This is my adorable Matthew.  He's my nephew. I think he is the sweetest little guy!  I wanted to give him hugs all the time.
Angela, is in the background.  Jeff, David, Veronica and Hannah are also in the background.

 Jeff taking little Rosie and David on the sled.  Since we don't own snow clothes we borrowed a lot from the Kohler's.  David had to wear these pink snow pants.  After a lot of tears he finally agreed and had the best time after he wasn't freezing.  We didn't have the heart to tell him that the boots he was wearing were girl boots too.

Vanessa, Hailey, Hannah and Rose checking out the dog. Just looking at the dog made me shiver!

 I reminded Vanessa that she wanted to make a snow angel but then I took her mittens off and this otherwise happy occasion turned into a very cold and sad affair.  Sorry.

Rose with a very sticky, chocolate caramel apple.

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I love this time of year because everything seems to slow down at night.  I loved being in Idaho because at night it was actually quiet!  I could listen to the snow, which is kind of beautiful.  If you haven't tried, you really should.  I love seeing family that I don't get to see very often - Rachel, Darrin and Logan Bronson; Tom, Angela, Hannah, Hailey, Matthew and Rosie Kohler; Mindy, Jesse, Lincoln, Parker, Griffin and Oliver Bird, and of course Craig and Mary.  I love Jeff's family and how everyone gets along.  I love all my neices and nephews!  I can't wait for when all the cousins are together!  Being in IF made me miss my parents and my brother and his family.  We celebrate differently but the memories that we are creating with each other are the same.  I love slowing down and being with family, whichever side they come from!  I did miss going to the LA Temple on Christmas Eve to see the lights and coming back and eating a late night pan con chumpe.  We did drive David and Veronica over to the Idaho Falls Temple, no lights but the river was semi-frozen and beautiful.  I hope we all had an amazing Christmas.  Where ever I am at the moment, so long as Jeff isn't far from sight I will have the most amazing Christmas.  He really is the best man for me.  I know I am the luckiest!  Jeff and my kids are my home, my safety and my life, so long as I have that close by me I am so blessed.

Just breathe

There's a song that says, "just breathe..."
Sometimes I feel like that's all I can do.  I feel like so many things are out of my control and how quickly a seemingly 'normal' day can flip upside down, sideways, backwards, anyway but 'normal.'   Today, I am on edge.  I keep looking at the clock.  I keep looking at my babies here at home with me. I keep thinking of my babies that are not home and are in school right now.  I keep thinking of the brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers, aunts and uncles and cousins, who feel sorrow and heart ache that I can not comprehend at this moment. The verse in scripture comes to my brain, "Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in."
When I first heard the news I felt shock.  Then when I learned more details, like it was an elementary school, 26 casualties, one class not accounted for I could not control the tears.  I felt sick to my stomach, it literally sank everytime the details were repeated.  My thoughts quickly turned to my 2 kids that are in 3rd grade and Kindergarten.  I picked up the phone and dialed the school, but hung up.  That's not happening here.  I turned the television off.  I thought of the times when I would go to my kids classes, and simply walk through the doors and see all the kids turn their heads to see who was at the door, the curiosity in their eyes and the pure happiness and innocence.  Is that how they looked?  At least for a second?  Were they scared?  Even as I write this insignificant post, because my sorrow is nothing compared to the sorrow of the parents, family, friends of those babies and the school workers/teachers, I feel so heartbroken, so raw, so sad.  I don't know if I can comprehend such devastation but I do know that my comfort comes from the Lord, Jesus Christ.  When Jesus was born a great hope was also born because this is what people heard and believed would be the path to eternal life and love.  Anyway, His birth was significant, His life on earth is significant, His life as ransom for us is significant.  This is what gives me comfort, what provides solace to my soul.  Christmas seems to be overwhelmed with parties, presents, stress, etc.  I so wish that tragedy did not have to happen to remember how significant celebrating the birth of our Savior is.  So, today I will breathe.  I will be grateful that I can pack my kids lunch to take to school.  I will be grateful when my kids come home after school with all the healthy stuff still neatly packed in their lunch boxes.  If I could remove some of the pain and sadness away I would, but I can't.  But, the Lord can.  He has!  For you for me for everyone who has and ever will live.  Don't feel sorry for me, don't worry about me.  I am fine.  I have a heavy heart but I am fine.  My heart breaks for those backpacks, those Christmas presents under the tree, those babies, those teachers who protected those children to the end.  I felt like I needed to express my heart. 

Mosiah 18:9

Family Fotos

We had some family photos done. I went away from the park scene and decided to do something different. I came across this part of town, purely on accident, a few days before the shoot. I kind of love the old town feel this had, and I am kind of a sucker for brick and vintage style buildings.

Anyway, it was defnitely a challenge gettting everyone coordinated and all happy for some awesome photography from the very talented Linda.  You can check out her site here.  Violet was pretty grumpy most of the shoot and you can't see all the candy we're handing her just to get her to even sit or want to be held.  It was a challenge.  But, my family loves Linda, and her husband and daughter were there making this endulgence of mine tolerable for my kids.  Other challenges:  UPS truck, a very busy alley, lots of wind, crazy hair, and getting 4 kids to look towards the camera without hating it!  I love these moments though.  Now the bigger challenge:  deciding on which to display and where to display them!

 

Veronica's big day!

Veronica has been so excited this year because she was going to turn 8!  And she could finally be baptized!  She's the last of her primary class to be baptized so she's been so eager and anxious. 
It was such a special day.  I didn't take many pictures...I was kind of taking it in and when I remembered to take pictures I couldn't get the right people together. 
Veronica's grandparents came from Idaho and her abuelos came too.  Tio and tia with Layla also came.  It was so overwhelming to see the support and to feel the love from everyone there.  I cannot find the proper words to express the gratitude in my heart from all the support we have felt from family and friends leading up to this point. 
It was special.  It was amazing.  Veronica came to me, after we left and she said, "Mom, I feel warm inside. I'm so happy to be baptized." 

Funny observation

I was at playgroup this week.  I love going to playgroup.  Our kids get to play with each other and I get a chance to chat with some really special ladies.  Anyway, it's good for both parent and child.  I have come to know different ladies and have learned a lot and have forged bonds with these ladies. I love this playgroup!

Today, while I was watching Violet push a little push toy around a playroom these other two kids (not related to each other) were playing in a corner.  I paid attention to Violet, because she is so cute to watch I lose track of time just watching, and minded none to the other kids in the room.  Anyway, I heard crying and looked up and saw a little boy crying, he was probably close to 2 yrs old.  This 2 yr old had a helicopter mom.  There is nothing wrong with that, I am just not one.  Anyway, she was never more than a foot away from her son the entire time I noticed her.  She picked up her son and held him tight and got the attention of the mother of the child that hit her son.  This other mother, was chatting with a girlfriend with her back to her little girl that had slipped into this other playroom.  I am not judging this mom either, because I lose track of my kids on a daily basis.  Anyway, helicopter mom told chatty mom that her daughter hit her son on the head.  Chatty mom almost seemed annoyed that she had to pause her conversation to discipline her kid - which in this case was to say sorry.  Chatty mom didn't apologize to helicopter mom nor the crying kid.  She picked up her daughter and said, "You have to say you're sorry."  The little girl said she was sorry.  Helicopter mom didn't seem satisfied with the response from chatty mom nor from the little girl.  And really, when a kid under 3 apologizes is it really an apology?  I think it's good for them to know that they should apologize but as adults we should know that they are being obedient to their parents and probably don't really understand the whole apology.  Anyway, helicopter mom was packing up her things and chatty mom kept chatting with her girlfriend when helicopter mom, as she was walking away, said that the little girl hit her son on purpose-- deliberately.  Chatty mom, finally responded to helicopter mom with gusto, "I doubt it was deliberate.  She's just being a two year old."  I doubt this little girl intended on hurting the little boy.  From watching my kids and other kids, I know that sometimes kids will hit but it's not because they want to harm other kids it's because kids are kids and they have their "turf" and will protect it...either by hitting, crying, pushing, running away, whatever.  I don't know how I would've reacted.  I have always struggled with knowing when to step in and "protect" my child from unwanted pushing, hitting or screaming.   My kids are usually on the receiving end of the pushing or hitting, not very much because they're pretty good about stepping away in those situations.  But I have had to step in a handful of times and really make known that I am mama-bear and you (seemingly innocent child) better step off.  I may have reacted differently when I only had one kid versus 4 kids.  Or maybe I'm more protective now than I was.  When my kids get pushed around when they're playing soccer I am a mama-bear and I have to breathe and count to 10 and sometimes I feel like kids have to work it out and figure out how to stand their ground and not let kids push them around.  I have been helicopter mom and chatty mom and an array of other labels.  I'm anticipating that Violet will be the one pushing kids because she is #4 and her whole life has been survival of the fittest.  When she wants something she will take it.  She does it with her siblings all the time.  She is a fighter and I feel like I have to prepare for the future.  Any advice?

Some futbol!

I think Violet is ready for the game.

 

 

 

David in action!

 

 

 

 

It's a Mario PARTY!!!

Veronica requested a Mario Party for her 8th birthday.  I feel like it's been her birthday for the past 2 weeks!  We still have her baptism that's in a couple of weeks.  So, everything that comes with turning 8, in our family, is taking quite some time!  I was dreading this party but kind of excited for the outcome.  It was fun and after I completed one project I would smile because it was satisfying.  I only wish the kids appreciate the awesomeness of this party.  I got a lot of my ideas from pinterest but mostly from my knowledge of all things Mario...which isn't much more than the first ever Super Mario Bros game.  My buddy, Linda, helped me so much and encouraged me when I was so tired to make it to the finish line.  We did a chat about my ideas and she even made an outline for me to keep me focused.  She took most of the pictures.  If Jeff would let me I would keep the decor up forever but he was over it and wanted it put away.

Some of the unfinished projects.  The goody bags, Mario mustache-on-a-stick, and the pin the mustache on Mario game (pre-color).  

The cupcakes. Simple, really.  I used chocolate, because that's what Veronica wanted.  What says Mario more than 1up cupcakes and lots of red and blue! 

The whole point of the mustaches was for taking pictures in front of a back drop that I made.  The mustaches were for keeps when the kids left but the kids only humoured me for a few pictures.  After that I sensed the "mom, really...this is lame let us go play!" vibe. 

Stars and the pipes and the piranha plants. My buddy, Linda, made the pipes out of toilet paper rolls, clever, huh?Linda also made the star rice krispies treats.  They were the perfect touch to the table.  They were as good as they looked! 

In the spirit of Mario Bros. I thought it would be fun to have places where the kids could "bust" bricks or question boxes and get coins.  













Veronica wasted no time busting it open!

We did a boo stomp.  I put a coin in each white balloon before I blew them up with air.  Then I used my trusty black sharpie to draw the face. It was quite simple. Then, I told the kids to try and not step on each other or hurt each other.  I had Jeff put some Mario music that he found on youtube and the kids had a blast.  I love this picture on the bottom of all this kids stomping the boos.  Most of the kids are a blur but that's what is fun about it.  They were all laughing and having so much fun.

Sorry about the Happy Birthday sign that fell.  I thought the goody bags were such a good decoration I almost didn't want to give them away.  Linda had these brick boxes that were perfect for the occasion. 
It was simply torture for the kids to not touch any of the decorations or treats or anything leading up to the party!  Once I finally gave David his goody bag he was the happiest.  David loves all things Mario so this was sort of a practice for an eventual Mario party of his own.  The goody bags had stickers and some candy and a question mark box with candy in them.

We had the kids decorate their star-power necklaces.

 

The backdrop.  I should've used more blue poster board to go all the way to the bottom of the wall. I ran out of time to get more, but the photo booth idea wasn't really flying with the kids.  They didn't want to stand still long enough for a photo-op.  Oh well. 

Here are the fabulous party planners.  We actually stood still long enough for this photo. 
I think the kids had a blast.  I consider this very good practice for a Mario Party of awesomeness come one of David's birthdays!